Rejoice, O young man, in thy youth; and let thy heart cheer thee in the days of thy youth, and walk in the ways of thine heart, and in the sight of thine eyes; but know thou, that for all these things God will bring thee to judgment

Ecclesiastes 11:9, King James Version

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Ode to Me

Perpetual drumbeats of a heart
Loneliness creeping in slowly
Worming in and not letting go
Like cancer
Fatalistic to the very core

The cheer outside seems foreign to me
Deaf to their laughter and joy
I have Sorrow as my bedmate
Anger as my companion
And Angst as my brother-in-arms

They dance and drink
While my heart burns
With anger and yearns
For bloodshed to appease
My bloodlust needs a feast

I am gone
Beyond salvation and all hope
Emptiness is me
Holding a shield of Fear
And a sword of Anger

Seeking to banquish all
That is good

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Dance of The Red

Dance of the red
Against the pretty pale white
Look above you
The snow is falling
And so is your blood

I love you yes I do
Til my heart aches and screams
Underneath the mistletoe
I first saw you
All clothed in black
My dear pussy cat

Ah yes I do love you
My fair maiden of the darkness
To you I giveth my heart
Surrender my soul too if need be

Do you feel it pumping for you
Beating so softly ever in your tender hands
My heart is with you

Oh what a foul betrayal then!
What have you done to me?
To twist my heart into pieces
I see in it a thousand reflections
Of my Self
In a thousand hundred shards

I lose my Self in those reflections
What am I without and within?

In the Dance of the Red I was
Caught up in the Redness/madness
Engulfed me and I became Another

My senses took leave of me
And fled for another vessel
I could remember the look
Of horror in the windows of your Soul
Like something gone awry

Did you feel the pain
The searing hot feeling of the blade
And how orifice after orifice opened up
Gaping holes of darkness

Dance with me for the last time ma cherie
Upon this I pledge my soul
As the final melody ends

You can go to Hell for all I care
And rot in its eternal damnation
With weasels and worms
And may fire burn your very soul
As it burns mine now


Letter #14-Albeo

Now now what can I say? The moment I heaved away the blankets of Light, for another new beginning of the Night, what shall I see but white cheer everywhere? It drags painfully upon my vampiric heart to see such good spirits around. Perhaps not my humane one though.

I have nothing much to say, nothing much to say today. It is simply too cheerful for me to stand it. Have you even flipped the papers today? They have four stories of Christmas cheer by four youths and they say it’s promising! The gall of them to claim so! Spreading cheer when none is needed. Such a cliche…of what? Camaderie? Goodwill? Tis for the nth time that I am hearing it. Even a mortal will be repulsed in his ever so short lifespan, not to mention me. Could you humans please please, I beg of you, leave us alone with all your cliches and whatnots. Stop your false pretense of positivity. Drop your cloak of shadows, you shapeshifters. Reveal your true self if you dare you bunch of spineless and headless hypocrites.

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Letter #13-Abnocto

It has been a very long night for me, as I lie about in the enclosed haven of darkness, she swallowing every morsel of light, leaving me in a comforting daze, akin to the mortals of imbibing alcohol and getting high. Events of that night ran through my celebral organ, flashing past with an incoherent speed that I could not even catch. Perhaps it was due to the influence of alcohol too.

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Letter #12-Caelestis

My dear, what happened to you? Why are you looking so bored to tears? Let me tell you a wonderful happening that occured today. Today, I woke up earlier than usual, not like my usual waking times as a Child of the Night. Today I saw the sunset in its full crowning glory. Like a fiery fireball it illuminated the vast heavens with a violet shimmer, as though Christ himself was coming and the Great Tribulation was starting. I had never saw the sunset since that fateful day of my Making. Today, I don’t know what came over me, but I was compelled by some unseen force, some preternatural strength, to open my eyelids and throw the thick curtains to one side.

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Letter#-11Maneo Manere Mansi Mansum Intransit

Insofar as I know, I love the night. I always do. The cloak of darkness shrouding all in secrecy, revealing nothing without the presence of light. The cool whispers of the night breeze caressing your cheeks like a forgotten lover. The eerie glow of the night lights juxtaposed against the depth of the darkness, always trying to drive away the darkness but failing to. It is just so beautiful, so appealing and erotic to the lost soul.

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